Life is about Transitions

Whether it be

  • Moving away from your comfort zone to live completely on your own for the first time
  • A break up or family member passing to feel the loss of someone so important
  • Someone who treats you unfairly to make you dig your way back onto your steady feet.

Life is about moving forward.

Not with our feelings…not with our wants and fantasies.

But, with reality. With the facts. Accepting what we observe entirely.

  • It IS our time to live alone NOW.
  • It IS time for this relationship to end NOW.
  • It IS the cycle of life taking away my loved one’s life NOW.
  • It IS a cruel human who doesn’t see to understand anything beyond a self-absorbed direction spending his time trying to cut me down NOW.

Even if you do not want these things.

Even if they hurt so badly.

Our feelings may teach.

But, they will never tell us where to point our feet next.

  • Get scared and move back with your parents or find a relationship just for the purpose of not feeling alone
  • Staying in the relationship lying to yourself and the other person about why your lives align so well and how the mistakes are trivial
  • Not accepting it and making the last minutes, days, months, years on earth an obsession
  • Being the victim and sticking around to “fix that person” or see the good in him or her

If life has taught me one thing, it is that we are always a student.

We are always learning…and then the next step of leaping on the change and growth. Otherwise, the transition…the experience…will pass us by. Until the next one hits us even harder. Harder, because this time we know everything we learned last time, but we did nothing to change and grow during the space between our major transitions.

You will show your REAL self during the transitions.

  • You may show that you only care about how you feel and act to the point of self, other, or life-destruction.
  • You could stay calm, breathe, and see what room there is to grow for the next time this situation or a similar one rolls around.

There is always a transition happening in front of us (we need to pee so we stop what we are doing and go to the bathroom, someone has a question and you have to stop your plan of the day to teach this student who is willing to learn)…some transitions may just be more significant than others.

Nonetheless, every second is an opportunity to open up, learn, and grow with who we are and what we can influence in our world, others’ worlds, and the world that we are all surrounded by.

Stop arguing away the realities in front of us.

Accept the truth.

And move with it (not around it or by trying to bash it into the ground…you will just crash either way)

Be the student.

Live through your questions and not your feelings.

Find respect and beauty in the human you have the potential to be.

Completely immerse yourself in the transition in front of you so that you don’t miss it…slow down…pay attention for the sake of your future self…you only have one life.

Well, I looked my demons in the eyes
laid bare my chest, said “Do your best, destroy me.
You see, I’ve been to hell and back so many times,
I must admit you kind of bore me.”
There’s a lot of things that can kill a man
There’s a lot of ways to die
Yes, and some already dead that walk beside me
There’s a lot of things I don’t understand
Why so many people lie
Well, it’s the hurt I hide that fuels the fires inside me”

About Kevin Carlstead

I graduated as a hospitality and psychology student at University of Denver. I spent most of my teenage and young adult years in the hospitality industry. I am still searching for what industry suits my personality and talents so that I can feel more meaning throughout my days. My current career pursuit has me enrolled in a graduate program to become a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. I was born and raised in San Diego, CA. I love music with something to it. I love life with something to it. I have made it one of my purposes in this life to integrate both of these things that I love. This blog and my own songwriting has given me the platforms to do that very thing. Thank you for reading.
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