Response Struggle


It’s scary feeling we’re alive…knowing we will die…no shield to defend our emotions, our inadequacies, our fragile existence. How do we respond to these vulnerabilities? We struggle trying to respond. Consistently overwhelmed when it all changes again and again. I see how we manage. I see how we respond. Mostly I just say, “well, what else can we do?” But, more scared than being vulnerable, I tremble at the consequence of our own mechanisms.

So many of you with power. There by climbing the tower. Deserved? Depends on how it’s measured…seek deep down to find your pleasure.

Facing responsibility, do you see us as the pawns? Your game of plastic, a fable, a self-absorbed facade?

They, under you, must endure the pain. What? They have to live. Money, food and shelter is what they’re bribed with…a shame.

Denying this reality is the perfect example. Your image so holy. Controlling masks thru words, charts, and a quick, pressured, smiling sample.

You say you are good, that you are nice, and that you do treasure this beautiful life. But, what else do your actions prove? …subtle manipulations getting them to move.

Are the ones without the power the less decadent, the more true? The noble beings standing all in a line for you?

As your knuckles rid the wrinkle and the hand clenches the neck, they bite, they thrash, and one finger at a time they get.

Yes, sometimes the tables turn, with their oppression lashing tides. They were taught by you here and will torture till demise.

So, black or white? No. There is no color. This human nature is distorted and gray, all muddled in our numbers.

We herd with who we follow. Fight fire with fire too. Then, once in a while: a lonely human does digress to think this all through.

Living close to the facts and calling it how she sees it. Control is not important, just integrity she’ll admit.

For this life is not a thing and power is just an illusion. Try to lock her up, but her mind will keep on moving.

Relax. Take a breath. That’s when you think the clearest:

Take in their perspective you’ll find how close you stand. Take in history’s picture, you’ll minimize your life’s span. Take in the world’s immensity, your strength is worth nothing.

Power is just an illusion…you won’t change their minds. Habits are much stronger, as they consistently take their time.

Power is just an illusion…you won’t succeed in everything. Perfection is not a card, you’ll diminish beauty’s reality.

Power is just an illusion…you won’t be seen by mars. The universe could implode instantly and your fragile brain goes dark.

Just, sit. Listen. The world just keeps on spinning. Breathe. Relax. You’re just one pawn in it.

There is so much in the world and so much in our minds to learn. There is true fun in the adventure. The journey of the education is all we truly have time to do. Reflect on how much time is wasted on our egos, distractions, and frivolous pleasures. I guess we can watch a show sometimes to forget how small we are 😉 but life is right here and if we consistently lose touch, the beat keeps bumping with no rewind.

There are so many ways to approach our purpose in this present moment. What options bear the most fruit? I’ve been filled from the underlying purposes below:

  • Relaxed and…still
  • Alone with…integrity
  • Equitable and…open
  • Humble with…pure honesty
  • Humble with…untouched innocence
  • Humble with…persistent curiosity

When you are able to break the habit of attempting to control your illusion of your image…When you are able to break the habit thinking that power is real…then, you have the option to replace it with this insight:

If you have ever trained a dog or raised a child, have you ever noticed that manipulation and fear only work for a short period of time. Then, you notice their manners are gone the next day or a week later. It is because they don’t ACTUALLY want to do the things you tell them to do…they are just scared not to, or were manipulated into doing it. If they truly respect you, then they will WANT to do the actions/tasks you ask of them. This respect comes from a bonded trust. They TRUST you because they see you are honest. They TRUST you because they see your actions go along with the words you say. They TRUST you because what you ask them to do…you do it too. If they truly respect and trust you, it is because you give them options, treat them like a living creature, and SHOW you truly love them through an undying want to nurture their real needs of curiosity, hunger, warmth, and their longing to be heard.



Well, I try my best
To be just like I am
But everybody wants you
To be just like them.
They say sing while you slave and I just get bored.
I ain’t gonna work on Maggie’s farm no more.

Bob Dylan is a lyricist that comes up with some clever melodies to appropriately flow his songs. Mostly, his lyrics are what made him a staple in the revolution against the 50’s way of living. I truly love that he can become such a popular artist through this channel. It is this important to me because most people do not look for this in the numbing music of the stations they flip through today.

In Maggie’s Farm, Dylan talks about human nature’s “struggles of power.” If you listen to who people truly want to be…this world could spare some decency. These people with major responsibility “on the top” could mutually share the worlds opportunities…with understanding and love. Fighting fire with fire will be a twinkle in our eye once oppression, even in the slightest form, leaves our egotistical purposes.

About Kevin Carlstead

I graduated as a hospitality and psychology student at University of Denver. I spent most of my teenage and young adult years in the hospitality industry. I am still searching for what industry suits my personality and talents so that I can feel more meaning throughout my days. My current career pursuit has me enrolled in a graduate program to become a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. I was born and raised in San Diego, CA. I love music with something to it. I love life with something to it. I have made it one of my purposes in this life to integrate both of these things that I love. This blog and my own songwriting has given me the platforms to do that very thing. Thank you for reading.
This entry was posted in Control is an Illusion and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s