For years, I have been struggling with going to sleep at night. During a few day span of not sleeping, I would become sick with a cold or flu, mentally exhausted, and my body was not healing as it normally would. These negative consequences are stained in my mind. I also experienced enough times where I have slept well for a few days. In these times, I notice that I don’t get sick, I have an incredible amount of mental energy, and I heal much quicker.

Over the years, I have defined “sleep” through my own experiences. Many times I have thought, “Wow, I need to change.” Many times I have thought, “This can’t happen anymore…I need to sleep.” But, nonetheless, I never changed and spent many struggles regretting never shifting my behavior…never learning…never growing.

If I make the goal important enough…if I make the goal a whole-hearted decision…if I am absolutely serious when I say “yes” to getting this goal accomplish, then I spend my money, time, effort, and energy creating each step until that last step reaches the door of fulfillment. If I keep it on the back burner or put it to the side, eventually I will forget and let the importance of my goals slip away into failure.

“Maybe” doesn’t cut it. “Yea, I’ll get to it” doesn’t get anywhere near the realm of success. It is either a whole-hearted decision to go full-throttle at the goal or it will consistently be another failure notch on the belt.

I can look at this lesson above and say, “okay, great, so I will just say ‘yes’ to the things in my life and I will be happy.” This is actually not the case and, at that point, it would just be a promise…a rule…a tradition that makes us feel better in the moment, but falls short of substance when reality tells a different story. Learning how to choose is necessary to truly saying “yes” to accomplishing a goal. Promises can be empty, while choices are always full of desire and passion. I will consistently choose substance over image any day.

—- Glen Hansard’s Grace Beneath the Pines —-

Even when finally stepping towards accomplishing a goal, there will be bumps and bruises along the way that need to be recovered with a reminder of why the decision to continue is so relevant…so important. Then, I’ll take the humbled baby steps to get the top spinning again. Imperfection is what I am seeking…and there is so much potential within this imperfect space to consistently be in the flow of passion. “They’ll be no more running around for me…no more backing down you see…I’ll get through this.”